I am a terrible procrastinator. Always have been, probably always will be. I like to think it stems from being an only child; being alone is not some terrible punishment, but a chance for me to relax and indulge myself in all my favourite activities (which only really consist of reading, arguing about politics and watching American dramas because of the attractive men). So when I make sure everyone is out of the house (I don’t study in my room, it’s too cold), I find I can’t make myself study. Especially since my TMA is not due in until the 11th and it’s only the 1st today. I need the pressure of an immediate deadline hanging over my head to make me work.
Yesterday I managed to make some notes for my TMA. It was pretty easy; just writing about the art works and the artists. Today, however, I need to somehow start bringing theorists into it, which is always the difficult part. Tomorrow and Thursday will be my days to type up my notes and put them into a coherent order, but not today. Today is a thinking day.
I usually try to put off writing an essay until I have a flash of inspiration, which, ironically, only comes from making notes. This in itself is difficult; the house I live in with my parents is very odd and there is no dining room (it’s a wooden house that was sent over from Sweden flat pack; true story). This means we have no dining table. This in turn means that I make my notes sat on the sofa, cross legged, with all my books and papers strewn around me. It does work for me, but it doesn’t make for a peaceful and relaxing work environment.
I try to get inspiration sometimes from the course forums. These are very handy, but they can also be quite daunting. At the moment there are some brilliant discussions about modernism versus postmodernism, and what actually is the artwork in Ana Mendieta’s Siluetas. But sometimes you come across a discussion, and it takes me back to my time at Kent, where I would be sitting in a seminar surrounded by people who had read hundreds of more plays than I had, and were discussing them in great detail. I would sit there silent and dumbfounded, and would eventually end up switching off and doodling. Sometimes I get this with the forums; these are people older than me, with a great deal more life experience, discussing things I could have no hope of understanding due to the fact that I am only 23, live with my parents, don’t drive, and my parents never really took me to art galleries anyway.
I like to think that these people are either reading into things too much, or just have great flashes of inspiration and need to think out loud, and it is something I needn’t worry myself about.
So, in a nutshell – the forums: an invaluable resource, but daunting at times.
What am I doing now, anyway? Procrastinating. I really need to ‘pull my finger out’ (as my mom would say) and make some notes!